why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
