He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
