In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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