I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
