What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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