He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
