Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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