So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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