He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
