So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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