My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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