it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
and you said cock pushups were impossible
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
found the other keg... it's in the tree
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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