The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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