I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Sext me about skeletons
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
