I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
