You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
