He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Green mimosas i think yes
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
