There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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