If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Randomize
