some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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