it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
