Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize
