I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
