Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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