yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
