I hate all girls vehemently.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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