I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
