We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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