No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
