Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
