I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
