Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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