don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Randomize