I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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