I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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