Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
