I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
