How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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