i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
that's an acceptable place to lick
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
