I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
honey bunches of taint.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
