Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
