god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize