Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
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