I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
