Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
