you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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