i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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