That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
there is glitter all over my balls
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
