I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
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