I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
