i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
